Diane’s Story

I just had to contact you.

I wish I could find the words to tell my full story, as people don't know how a person feels after being raped from a young age; I was about ten when it started and fifteen when it ended. Maybe I will be able to do that one day.

My attacker was a family member who was trusted with children. He was recently found guilty and sentenced to nineteen years in prison for raping me over two thousand times but in reality it was over three thousand rapes. There was an element of doubt over the amount as I could not clearly remember the age it when it all started.

I am now forty six years old and trying to start my life but how am I supposed to be who am I? I feel lost now as I have lived with this for thirty five years and dealt with it in a way which I thought was normal and I was in control of my own head.

But now the truth is out and community and family know. I did not say anything to anyone when I was younger as I would have gone into care for lying. Then later in life as I grew up I believed it was my fault for not being able to stop him.

When I was fifteen he then moved on to my cousin and I also feel really guilty for allowing him to continue with other children. I do not feel in control anymore how do you get over something like this?

Guest post written by Diane and posted with permission via email contact
10.12.14

Edited and Posted by Team Inspire